- When you meet them and they tickle the palm of your hand with their finger. This will never be a normal relationship. You are likely to be afraid of being alone in the house with them and wary if they get within a foot of your personal space.
- If you forget to mention that you are going away and upon your return tell you that they sniffed your door. Even if this is an attempt at checking to smell out your potentially rotting corpse inside, it is still creepy AF. In this day and age, a simple text / call / Facebook stalk would do.
- If they have lived there for awhile, but seem to have gone through far too many housemates. Moving is a nightmare. It is unsettling, disruptive, expensive and a pain in the ass. If your housemate has managed to turnover housemates at an alarming rate – run! Run far away and do not look back.
- They refuse to join the house Whatsapp / Messenger group. Everyone has busy lives and conflicting schedules. Housemate chat groups are essential to disseminate information. An actual example that a friend of mine received from their housechat: “I am bringing a lovely lady back laaaate tonight, so please leave the heating on for us 😉 ”. You know essential information.
- Passive-Aggressive behaviour. Period. Whether it is putting the top of the bin on your pile of dishes, because you accidentally spilt two granules of rice and gravy on the lid; removing the television aerial cable, because you watched the world cup until 11pm one Sunday; threw the bathmat out of the window, because you forgot to pick it up again; or hid all of the teaspoons (I am talking like 17 or so) in an airing cupboard, because you left two spoons on the teaspoon holder with the teabags. Living together is not easy and passive-aggressive behaviour is not on!
- They hit on the people you bring over. Light flirting is good fun and can be a way to get to know new people. If your housemate, creeps on every member of the opposite sex that you bring over, it gets very awkward and unpleasant! You are less likely to want your friends to come over, which is not fair on you.
- If your underwear starts to go missing… Everyone misplaces the odd pair of briefs, but when you have to buy a whole new set of five or six something is totes wrong.
- Your housemate has audible nights of passion…for one. Nothing wrong with a bit of self-love, but full-blown sessions complete with moving bed, grunting, panting and bouncing when you know there is no-one else in the room is just…unusual …and may explain where your underwear is!
KatyApple 